Mummy confession 2.0

March 5, 2015

My house is a bomb site.

Not sometimes, all the time.  And I  HATE cleaning. I hate it with a passion.

Cleaning to me is a waste of my time. Time that could be spent with the kids, or on my lounge on Facebook.

This poses a few issues.

image1. With a family this size there’s always something to clean

2. My husband wishes he’d married Alice from the Brady Bunch.

3. My kids have acquired the same hatred for cleaning so no one does anything to help – ever.

My husband has for years (and still does) complained about the state of the house. “It’s an embarrassment” (true) “It’s your job” (technically correct) And “we can never find anything and the house is full of crap” (100% correct)

After I had daughter 2 and we had just come home from hospital, I was having a particularly bad day. He walked in, my son had run away, I was nude from the waist down, the 2 girls were naked. I was covered in vomit and crying hysterically. He had walked over a pile of nappies to get in the front door – and he looks at me and says – wait for it – “do you ever clean the skirting boards around here?”

I obviously didn’t kill him. Because I have 2 more kids to prove he’s still alive. And he has never ever asked me about a skirting board again, which is lucky for him, and me – because I don’t know whether the house we live in now has any.

What he has done is get me a cleaner – and I’ve finally found one I love. She comes once a week and the house is clean for an hour tops. The rest of the time the dishes aren’t done, the house is a mess. The kids go laundry diving in the pile to get a pair of undies and my washing pile falls out of the laundry. The floors need mopping and the table is sticky. When strangers come over I pretend I’m sick to excuse the state of it. My sister comes and folds my washing because she pities me.

I’ll never have a clean house and I’ll lie about the easy day I’ve had to excuse my lack of cleaning – because I JUST DON’T WANT to clean!

I’d rather sit on Facebook instead.



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  • Reply The Apprentice March 5, 2015 at 8:44 pm

    I wanted to marry Alice from the Brady Bunch! Unfortunately it’s illegal
    In this country and I’m pretty sure she had a thing for Sam the butcher:(

    • Reply MumToFive March 5, 2015 at 10:11 pm

      Alice has a lot to answer for keeping that house so tidy with 6 children in it. And cooking that meat loaf every night for years.

  • Reply Jess March 5, 2015 at 9:10 pm

    I love this I’m a mum of four and I get so sick of cleaning.

    • Reply MumToFive March 5, 2015 at 10:10 pm

      It’s a thankless job isn’t it? You would understand with that many children there isn’t much point when they destroy the place faster than you can clean it!

      • Reply Jess March 5, 2015 at 11:56 pm

        It is so nice seeing someone being real about being a mum. We can’t always have the house spotless how can you with young kids.

        • Reply MumToFive March 6, 2015 at 1:38 am

          Exactly, unless you get rid of the kids or everything in the house it’s a never ending battle!

  • Reply Holly March 5, 2015 at 11:29 pm

    I love your honesty. I’m not very good at cleaning either. And I have too much crap. But I’m working on it. Still, there’s more fun ways to spend our time 😉

    • Reply MumToFive March 6, 2015 at 1:36 am

      I agree! Much better ways to spend time than cleaning 🙂

  • Reply Christine @ Adventure, Baby! March 6, 2015 at 11:56 pm

    Visiting your blog for the first time from #Aussieparentingbloggers. Lol at this – we have a cleaner too, otherwise we’d be divorced 😉

    • Reply MumToFive March 7, 2015 at 2:04 am

      🙂 hello!
      Yes a cleaner has ensured I stay married I’m sure..she deserves a medal coming to this house 🙂

  • Reply Mumma McD March 7, 2015 at 12:01 am

    I’ve only got 2 kids & my house is a bomb site too – I just hate cleaning! We got a cleaner but I had to fire her because she wasn’t good with boundaries & started facestalking me – awkward!!

    • Reply MumToFive March 13, 2015 at 10:40 am

      I had a strange cleaner once too I fired, she started talking about how she had dreams of hurting people!

  • Reply Laney@thelaneyfiles March 7, 2015 at 1:04 am

    i also hate cleaning, and husband hates mess! A constant source of arguments in our house! I say, we have four kids, of course they’re going to leave toys around! That’s just what they do!

    • Reply MumToFive March 7, 2015 at 2:03 am

      The more you have the more mess they make! I’m envious of these mums who can get their kids to do chores 🙂 mine need some training

  • Reply Robyna | the Mummy & the Minx March 7, 2015 at 9:39 am

    Amen – I feel like I might enjoy cleaning a bit more if things stayed clean for more than five minutes. It’s such an exercise in futility.

    • Reply MumToFive March 7, 2015 at 4:50 pm

      I agree. No one ever thanks you for it either which doesn’t help the cause!

  • Reply Anna@BombardedMum March 8, 2015 at 3:45 am

    I’m hearing you with the cleaner! We live on a military base and right now it is too hard to get a regular cleaner on to the base due to all the extra security measures – and sadly, it is also a ‘show house’ for regular people from my husbands work and so with 3 kids I am constantly cleaning my house… arghhhh. But my kids do also pitch in – they vacuum, fold clothes, make their beds (most of the time!) and pretty good with their toys now they are a bit older so every little bit helps.

    • Reply MumToFive March 8, 2015 at 7:33 am

      Can you train mine? They sound like great helpers!

  • Reply cate March 8, 2015 at 7:16 am

    I’m sure when my tiny one heads off to school and the house stays clean for longer, then I’ll enjoy cleaning; meanwhile, I’m with you, cleaning sucks!

    • Reply MumToFive March 8, 2015 at 7:33 am

      It def stays clean longer during school hours 🙂

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